Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Time Flies

So it’s been a year since stepping out of the plane in Singapore to start my Time in the Asia Pacific region…. And it’s now just  a bit over a year since returning back to work after a rather traumatic couple of months just before that...

So where do I stand now?

It’s been a year of ups and down, (sometimes even literally.. )on a Physical (ocular) level, Mental level, an Emotional level and many other levels, all in all its been a year of personal growth...

Work brought me here, and that’s been a hell of a ride in itself, but I think mostly I ended up getting re-acquainted with myself again, sometimes that wasn’t nice, sometimes it was great....

I have noticed that I have become a more emotional person since my "Blurry" days, maybe from being isolated and spending time with myself a bit too much, maybe for other reasons. But, whatever the reason is….I don’t see it necessarily as a bad thing, but i need to learn to guide and contain it a bit better i think..

but im working on that...look up the Chimp Paradox, it makes sense..

Anyway, going back to where i stand now?
Well, work is going fairly good, It has its up and downs as well of course, but its going...

On a personal level, I have met some great people that have flowed in and out of my life, just like that goes, and I hope that I can keep calling some of them my friend for a long time to come.

I have had big time support from old friends and family along the way aswell, sometimes mixed with causing them concern, and stress and maybe sometimes even letting them and myself down, but their continued support has certainly made these last 12months easier to navigate.

But.. but what about my eyes?

My Eyes, seem to have stabilised... don’t get me wrong, I have bad days, where i wake up and just know there’s no use of getting up in the first place, and just rest my eyes.. In fact, it happened last weekend.. But overall, they have become manageable

As I documented, I had to go through a week of "blindness" to
give my eyes a rest for some rigorous testing, and the results from that initially said I should be looking at Surgery, two different surgeries as such.... cross-linking and keraring, (see previous post on these procedures) these procedures would cost me a quite a bit to do, and would not fix the issue, they would just slow down the deterioration of the cornea.. Which basically means, it will get worse much slower..... and although I’m not dismissive of those procedures, I have done some online research and spoken to some optometry professional I have come across via the Keratoconus GB Facebook page, and have found that as I,

A, have had KC happening to me at a later stage in live than the average patient and
B. I’m hitting 40 in a couple of years,

it’s not the most effective procedure in the first place, as the deterioration is slowing down and stabilizing around this age, granted I got it quite late, but the big possibility is that I won’t deteriorate fast, and if it does there’s always the future …..

So for now its stick with another set of RGP’s……

That’s sort of where im standing now I guess…
Where am going? Will see…I hope more pushing outside of my comfort zone

Got some hiking lined up next weekend, kinda scary, very scary actually, but I need to keep pushing… I just need to 

and if all fail, maybe , just maybe this is the future

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